Dressing for the End of the World

Do clothes make the man?

Opening the closet this morning: a drab beige purgatory within. For thirty years, when shopping for clothes, the only question was: “Is this okay to wear at the office?” Even weekend clothes –polos & khakis– were purchased to fit an approved “Business Casual” profile.

Now age 59, released from corporate life, one realizes that the closet contains only suits and safe business attire.

When the film characters portrayed by Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman got out of Shawshank Prison, they ditched their convict clothing. But after escaping corporate prison, one is still dressed as a 9-5 drone.

Recently, having subscribed to the MasterClass streaming hub for its writing workshops, one also casually explored its "lifestyle" video courses, including a couple offering wardrobe advice. After all, nearing sixty, perhaps it was time to finally learn how to dress oneself.

The first course was by celebrity stylist Karla Welch, who dresses stars such as Justin Bieber for the stage and the red carpet. The “scumbro” look and drop-crotch pants she recommended might work well for Mr. Bieber, but their suitability for a gentleman with a gray beard seems dubious.

Much better was the course by Tan France, the friendly stylist from the “Queer Eye” makeover show. He has a more down-to-earth approach, and emphasizes two Style Rules:

1. Know your proportions

2. Know yourself

The first rule made sense. One has a very tall and skinny frame, but in the ‘90s found only boxy dress shirts at Macy’s, with too-short sleeves. So one always felt dressed as a scarecrow, or as Lurch from the Addams Family.

The arrival of internet shopping solved the sleeve problem: now, slim-fit shirts in Tall sizing could be ordered online.

Tan’s second Style rule, “Know Yourself,” poses a more existential puzzle than simple shirt sizing.

Miles Davis kept it simple, but was always his cool self.

One browses in Saks Fifth Avenue department store, and for the first time, instead of looking for business attire, one is selecting costume pieces for a new role. After all, who wants to die wearing beige Gap chinos? There's an opportunity for transformation: if the old corporate identity is gone, who is one dressing as now?

The prior uniform offered anonymous safety. New clothes might betray unconscious desires – perhaps a secret fetish revealed by red polka-dot socks.

Maybe the aging rock heroes of one's youth can serve as possible models.

Robert Smith and The Cure in the 80s

Some rockers have stayed consistent through long careers. Keith Richards is still decked out as a shipwrecked pirate, and Robert Smith of The Cure has retained his goth makeup for decades.

Today, 65 years old, Robert Smith still dresses as King of the Goths

Others have adapted over time. The Clash helped pioneer the punk look of the ‘70s.

The Clash in the 70s

Today the surviving members all wear Savile Row suits.

The Clash survivors now.

Likewise, Bowie’s glam costumes glittered when young, but in his fifties he too resorted to tailored suits.

One can also look beyond Western fashion: the Tokyo designer Yohji Yamamoto creates stark pieces that could exist comfortably in the 19th or the 23rd Century, on this planet or any other.

Yohji Yamamoto wearing his own gear

He and his models resemble weathered but noble ravens. Dignified nomads.

One desires the Yamamoto look, but unfortunately a designer jacket costs $2,800, so perhaps not.

There’s another perspective: all is vanity. Fashion is always haunted by Death. Caroline Evans wrote: “Everything new and beautiful seems to arrive already haunted by its own demise” in her book Fashion at the Edge: Spectacle, Modernity, and Deathliness.

And Barbara Vinken notes: “Clothing becomes a sign of mortality, an index of time that has passed.”

In traditional Buddhist teachings, the self is just a collection of five skandhas, or bundles. Pull them apart, and the self vanishes into emptiness. Not very different from one’s provisional identity formed by an outfit of clothing.

An identity sketched by an outfit simply masks the bare animal beneath. If the goth’s black clothes are removed, does the goth still exist?

Western dress followed a strict gender binary code in the 19th Century. These days, not so much.

As modern Zen philosopher RuPaul puts it: “We’re all born naked, and the rest is drag.”

Still, if we’re doomed anyway, why not enjoy the carnival while it lasts? Let all the flowers bloom vividly, before decay and disintegration.

The many moods of Jeff Goldblum

Now in his 70s, Jeff Goldblum delights in wearing exuberant and zany outfits. He wanders the streets wearing colorful prints that lie somewhere between paisley and wild hallucination.

One probably won’t go to the Goldblum extreme. But dressing for this moment… perhaps a vintage denim jacket, branded Memento Mori, will be a start.

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